PREACHER: REV. DR. WILLY MUTISO.
TEXT: GEN. 27: 1 – 46.
INTRODUCTION:
To relatives and friends, guessing who the favorite child is in the family is not difficult. Favoritism in the family is common, subtle, hurtful, and destructive. Jacob was favored by Rebecca, Esau by Isaac. The guilty party was the parents, not the children. The burden was passed to the children. What can parents do to raise healthy children? What kind of godly and moral character and example will you leave for your children? Are you preparing your children for their growth and independence? The goal of parenthood is independence.
Five characteristics are consistently found in mentally healthy families. Children in homes where the following qualities exist generally develop into happy, mature, emotionally and spiritually whole adults:
Love. Parents express genuine love and affection for each other and their children (1 Cor. 13).
Discipline. Discipline is considered essential. It is fair, quick, and to the point (Prov. 22:6).
Consistency. Parents are united on all rules and consistently enforce them (1 Peter 3:8-9).
Example. Parents live to the standards that they expect their children to observe (Deut. 5:29; 1 Tim. 3:4-5).
Authority. Parental authority is established and respected. The husband has the final authority in the home (Eph. 5:21-23).
Let us learn:
The more communication you have, the least concern (Gen. 27:1-4).
Isaac and Rebecca’s problems began long before Gen. 25:23-26.
They failed in communication. They did not keep the channels open on the welfare of their children.
Their partisan and polarizing support for their favorite child forced the succession issue.
A poisoned home environment clouded the family’s future.
Their communication was unwholesome. Rebecca spied on the husband’s talk with the older son.
Within time, Isaac and Rebecca had established a family dynamics: “Isaac loved Esau. Rebecca loved Jacob” (Gen. 25:28).
The fundamental parenting principle of fairly treating and loving all children was sabotaged by parents.
Isaac’s love for Esau was fleshly, carnal, and worldly. Isaac loved “tasty food” (Gen. 27:4,9,14).
Look at the following “rules for a happy marriage”:
Never both be angry at the same time.
Never yell at each other unless the house is on fire.
If one of you has to win an argument, let it be your mate.
If you must criticize, do it lovingly.
Never bring mistakes of the past.
Neglect the whole world rather than each other.
Never go to sleep with an argument unsettled.
At least once every day, say a kind word to your life partner.
When you have done something wrong, admit it and ask for forgiveness.
It takes two to make a quarrel, and the one in the wrong usually is the one who does the most talking.
The more conniving you are, the more condemned you will be (Gen. 27:18-24).
It has been said: “sow a thought, reap an act; sow an act, reap a habit; sow a habit, reap a character; sow a character, reap a destiny.”
Fundamentally, Rebecca did not trust her husband and her son Jacob.
She took everything into her hands and commanded things (“Obey me, obey my voice” – v.8,13).
She commanded her son like a general; she could read her husband like a book.
Jacob was not a natural liar, but a parent-emboldened liar (v.11-12).
Jacob escaped condemnation but faced heartbreak a generation later.
Jacob repeated the sin of favoritism to his son Joseph resulting to more hatred (Gen. 37:5-8).
The more controlling you are, the less custody you have (Gen. 27:41-45).
The more we control others, the less custody we have of them.
The people who lost the most, in the end, were not Isaac or Esau, but Rebecca and Jacob.
The family was filled with mistrust, dishonor, and disgust.
The two brothers could not tolerate each other.
Rebecca lost the most. She lost Esau and Jacob who left home. Isaac died! (v.45).
A mother’s dream of reuniting her sons, seeing her son’s marriage, seeing her daughter-in-law.
Jacob never saw Mama again and never attended her funeral.
The more controlling you are, the less custody you have.
CONCLUSION:
God’s way is the best. The way to trust God is submission to Him. Give Him all your fears and hopes. The result of distrust is suspicion, subversion, and spite.
Raise your children in Biblical values of brotherly love and God’s love. Don’t misrepresent God in the lives of your children.
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